A statistic boggled my mind. By the age of seventeen, the average person has heard three times more negative statements directed at their hopes, dreams and efforts than positive statements. Negative statements such as, “No you can’t do that”, “What makes you think you are good enough to do that?”, or “Just go to the burger place and apply for a summer job flipping burgers, okay? You don’t need to take courses on programming”. You may recall some negative statements from growing up. If you do recall them, post them as comments so they are removed from your thoughts right now.
The rare one out of four statements were positive, “You can do anything you put your mind to.”, “If you want to do that go for it!”, or “Just because no one has done that does not make one bit of a difference, someone has to be first.” Now we are talking!
The point of this discussion is, we are framed up to view options, change and new ways to do things from a negative programming. We begin crawling as little ones and it begins, “No, no, don’t touch that.”, “No, no, don’t play with that water it is not the bath tub it is a toilet bowl.”, or “No, no, don’t eat that, it is the dog’s food and treat.” You remember, right?
Numerous studies have shown that to instill lasting change into the mind of an adult person, spaced repetition is the fastest and most effective method. For example, if you attend a great workshop on time management and how to work more effectively, if you do not immediately put into action what you have heard and taken notes on by the end of that first week from the end of the workshop you have lost almost half of what you learned. If you wait a month and do not take action you may not even recall you attended the workshop.
An action we might take is to empower ourselves with personal growth. By surrounding ourselves in a safe environment where we are able to enhance our personal growth, share what we are learning with others and continue to surround ourselves with positive people, we are able to rapidly able to become empowered.
This ability will now overcome any negative thinking we may have embedded in our thought process. We will be fully ready to meet any challenges thrown our way. Our path to our goals has never been clearer. These are all the thoughts of the empowered person.
How do you overcome your negative thoughts?
Mitch Tublin is an advanced certified personal and executive coach who lives in Stamford,CT.
Very interesting statistic: By the age of seventeen, the average person has heard three times more negative statements directed at their hopes, dreams and efforts than positive statements.
I see this a lot in my business and my solution (for me and my clients) is to eat real whole food with a good breakfast that does include protein! some people need to avoid gluten (it can cause depression and negativity in some) and take supplements like tryptophan to boost serotonin and thereby ending negative thoughts!
Trudy,
You know I am a fan of your eating suggestions!
Interesting point! I know when I tune into my own thoughts, there is a lot of negative broadcasting a lot of the time. However, I don’t have to listen to it. What do I do to tune out those thoughts? I listen to music, I read things that inspire me, I watch TED talks, I laugh, and I remind myself what I am grateful for and what I am really out to accomplish. After all, if I don’t fulfill on my dreams they won’t happen, and that would just be a shame.
Terry,
Those TED Talks are great inspiration aren’t they?
I’m with you Terry on the TedTalks – pure inspiration.
I love your suggestion Mitch that “An action we might take is to empower ourselves with personal growth.” sounds like we should be teaching this to our kids before they reach 17!
Heidi,
Kids are like little sponges. Until they realize they know everything.
I’d never heard the term “spaced repetition” before, and I LOVE learning new things! I’ve been using this approach for years without a term for it, and I get POWERFUL results using it with my clients; so, I can DEFINITELY vouch for spaced repetition. I am a FAN!
Love, Katherine
Katherine C. H. E.
Author, Be True Rich
Katherine,
Now that is what I call some great feedback!
When working with clients I often find their attitudes toward food are rooted in their attitudes towards themselves, even if they are not aware of it. Learning to focus on the positive and recognized when those negative thoughts creep in is an important part of holistic health and healing.
Mira,
Somewhere I am hearing, “chocolate”!
Hadn’t heard that statistic – so interesting. And the impact of those negative statements can be long lasting. We can begin to believe those negative thoughts and it can become our default. We need to continue to counter those thoughts with more of the encouraging, supportive and positive ones.
Doreen,
Positive affirmations, personal growth audios and videos.
These are all great to reinforce the positive thoughts.
I was unaware of the study about spaced repetition — very interesting! I will have to read more about that. I use affirmations and being around other positive people to help me keep out negatives.
Carmen,
For certain being around positive people is a great way to stay positive!
Mitch,
I’ve always been a firm believer in the power of positive thoughts and the damage of negative thoughts. There are several ways I battle negativity. 1) Stay away from negative toxic people 2) Keep a journal of gratitude to focus on the abundance of what I do have 3) Keep a journal of success to celebrate wins (and when I have a bad day, flip through it to remind myself of the good days).
What about you?
Lisa
Lisa,
Your three are tops with me too. Especially celebrating the wins!
That can become habit forming!