Recently while attending an event where there were a variety of top notch professional speakers, one specific speaker struck a specific feeling in me and others. This speaker was essentially ranting about the urgency to take action immediately with his program so you will crush the competition. He might have even said something like, “crush them, step on their throats, stomp on their throats and don’t let up.” Virtually everyone in the audience was standing on their feet and cheering! Somehow my throat kept the nausea from producing a projectile vomit which would have painted the backs of the folks for three or four rows in front of me.

Was this really happening? It is 2013 right? What was missing here? Maybe this is not the right conference. Or maybe the speaker went to the wrong venue? No, there was his name right there on the program guide. He was finishing up and people were rushing to the back of the room to fill out the paperwork and purchase his program.

My view of my competition in the field of Business Consulting and Executive Coaching is if someone is good, if they have values, if they are trained and certified similar to me, if they are trustworthy and we know each other, if there is a client who is not a good fit for me, they get a referral from me. If there are articles or books which come across my desk which they might not know about, they are informed about them by me. It does not help anyone for a coach to have problems in their business, or for me to run my business with the intent to “crush” them.

What are we really saying about ourselves and our business if our business model is to first crush the competition?

In our communities, or in the online communities we belong to, it should be our intent and purpose to be gracious and to add value. It is better for the community of coaches to be more successful and bright coaches working and helping others. The coaches who do not operate in this manner create ill will for all of the rest of the coaching community.

This is not so easy to overcome. It is better to know your competition, embrace your competition, and assist your competition.

Mitch Tublin is an advanced certified personal and executive coach who resides in Stamford, CT.