What Costume Do You Wear?

Many people have been preparing for days, weeks, even months for the big day and maybe more importantly the big weekend right ahead. What would so many people put their time, energy, effort and money into? What else – a costume to wear for Halloween! This year the actual trick-or-treat day is on Monday. The weekend before will certainly be filled with parties to attend in full costume.

New York Costumes Halloween Adventure

Not too many years ago this was an activity for children in The Americas. A super hero, a law enforcement or fire fighter look alike, a soldier, a clown, a witch, a vampire, a bumble bee or even Frankenstein! There were endless choices. Now it is an adult ritual. In fact an entire industry has blossomed selling adult costumes!

Are you getting dressed up for a Halloween bash?

Go right now to the comments section and let us know what you will be dressed up as so we know who you are from across the room.

Here is the thing – are you authentic – are you real – in your daily business and personal life? OR – are you dressed up and in costume all of the time every day?

When in my first auditorium meeting with the entire entering class of the United States Merchant Marine Academy – after we were issued our gear, were yelled at, no screamed at, did numerous braces against the wall and push ups on the deck – we were all told to look to our right and to look to our left and understand that odds were only one of the three of us were going to graduate – period – actually we were told – it was a fact.

The statistics say the divorce rate in the United States is right around 50%. This means that every single time a couple gets married one out of two are going to be divorced. It seems clear to me – odds are great – that one or both of these folks are not being real, not being authentic in their relationship with the other person. Maybe even both of them are not being real and not being authentic. How does this happen?

We all have our personality – our behavior profile – which is who we are for real. Based upon a variety of circumstances and feedback from other people, some negative, some parts of this personality or behavior is selected to be hidden or tucked away. You may be shocked at how many people live this way for their entire lives!

Imagine for a moment if you really understood your personality and instead of hiding any aspect of it you were able to understand what other personalities exist in people and how you and they would be able to interact and get along better?

In my profession we utilize certain assessments to conduct this work. The results of the assessment combined with training permits people to excel to their highest levels in their personal lives and in business.

Ready to have your own assessment and review meeting or how about for your entire team? Contact Mitch Here!

Mitch Tublin is an advanced certified personal and executive coach, trainer and speaker based in Stamford, CT.

 

Are You In Costume Everyday of Your Life?

Are You In Costume Everyday of Your LifeAre you in costume everyday of your life?  At work and at home are you who you really are, or are you role playing all the time and you have lost track of who you really are?

Are you really you when you are working with your clients and customers?

The point of this question is do you assume a role? Essentially are you in costume when you show up to work with clients, customers or are out networking.? Is this what you do?

In addition, do you have MVS syndrome? This stands for Multiple Value Systems. There is the value system you ask your family to live by. The one you live by in your place of worship. Then there is the value system you utilize at work and with your employees, your clients and your customers. Maybe you cut corners. Maybe you do not treat all of your employees as real people with a real life outside of the workplace. Do you have MVS?

Allow me to apologize if anyone is feeling attacked. As you will see these are questions meant to have you reflect on yourself for a few moments. Let’s take a quick timeout.

In case the calendar has slipped your mind, this is the end of October! Which means it is time to conduct a few activities for next year. A few of these might include:

  1. Strategy for next year
  2. Goals for next year
  3. Monthly plan for next year
  4. Events you are attending/hosting next year
  5. Vacations you are taking next year

There is more. Where you are able to add in dates, timelines and due dates put these in place as well.

Okay, back to the main article.

People know a fake a mile away. Why does anyone even go there? Why not be yourself? Why not be honest about who you are and what you value and care about?

More often than you might imagine the answer is fear. There is a fear of failure. By acting as someone else, there is a feeling that you will not be the failure it will belong to this ‘other’ person and not you. This is not the only answer or reason. It is one possibility.

Another is a lack of confidence. Again by ‘playing’ another role it is like putting on the Superman outfit. My suggestion is to be yourself all the time. If wearing the Superman outfit makes you feel better, fine. Wear it all the time then!

Mitch Tublin is an advanced certified executive and personal coach who resides in Stamford, CT.